We are like this only...

I reproduce here, without comment, an unparalleled collection of gems which friend and fellow blogger, Mehul Kamdar, has sent in. Have to wonder, though, if anybody has ever put forward something similar in Yankee-ish: This is a collection of leave letters and applications written by people in various places of India ... 1. At Infosys, Bangalore, an employee applied for leave as follows: Since I have to go to my village to sell my land along with my wife, please sanction me one-week leave. 2. This is from Oracle Bangalore, from an employee who was performing the "mundan" ceremony of his 10 year old son: "as I want to shave my son's head, please leave me for two days.." 3. Another gem from CDACLeave-letter from an employee who was performing his daughter's wedding: ``As I am marrying my daughter, please grant a week's leave.." 4.From H.A.L. Administration dept: As my mother-in-law has expired and I am only one responsible for it, please grant me 10 days leave." 5. Another employee of HLL applied for half day leave as follows: :"Since I've to go to the cremation ground at 10 o-clock and I may not return, please grant me half day casual leave" 6. A leave letter to Mindtree Consulting: "I am suffering from fever, please declare one day holiday." 7. A leave letter to a headmaster: "As I am studying in this school I am suffering from headache. I request you to leave me today" 8. Another leave letter written to another headmaster: "As my headache is paining, please grant me leave for the day." 9. Covering note with a resume to a shipping company: "I am enclosed herewith..." 10. Another one: "Dear Sir: with reference to the above, please refer to my below..." 11. Actual letter written for application of leave at Ranbaxy "My wife is suffering from sickness and as I am her only husband at home I may be granted leave". 12. Letter writing: -"I am in well here and hope you are also in the same well." 13. A candidate's job application:" This has reference to your advertisement calling for a ' Typist and an Accountant - Male or Female'...As I am both for the past several years and I can handle both with good experience, I am applying for the post. Whatever, I still think any of Mehul's contributions pale before this one:Leave letter from student to teacher: ``Dear Madam, as my grandmother is suffering from romantic pains and my grandfather is no more, I have to take care of her. So, please grant me, etc. etc," Yes, you guessed right: the leave-seeker was of course speaking of granny's creaking joints: rheumatic!!!